A Cautionary Tale: Beware of the 13th Steppers

We will add more meetings if required. You can also phone in. Meetings are English speaking. Meetings geared towards Toronto, all cities in Ontario and the country of Canada. But any member, or person having a desire to stop drinking from any part of the world is more than welcome to attend. Even though this meeting is online we will continue to use the same traditions and principles.

Adventures of a Female 13th-Stepper

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Those who have never attended a step meeting have some misconceptions about how meetings actually work. Learn what to expect.

Myth 1: 90 meetings in 90 days. Not in our Big Book. Therefore not something the founders of our program suggested as part of the program of recovery. It may help some people but it is misleading, in that it suggests this action will help a still-suffering alcoholic recover and takes the focus off the 12 Steps. I have witnessed hundreds of members recover in 7 days or less by taking the Steps.

Many have never gone to a single AA meeting, let alone Myth 2: Get a Sponsor. I have seen many recover by following the suggestions in the Big Book and none of them ever had a sponsor. Sponsorship as it is practiced today creates a human dependence, which is entirely opposed to creating a dependence on a God of our own understanding. Myth 3: Join a Group. A group is not a Fellowship.

A Fellowship venerates, cherishes and honours the newcomer.

Should an AA Sponsor Try and Have a Sexual Relationship With a Sponsee?

The 12 Step program has helped many individuals overcome their addiction and find a meaningful life in recovery. This is not a recovery option that works for everyone, but for those who it does work for there can be spectacular results. Groups like Alcoholics Anonymous offer far more than fellowship and support — they also give the individual a program that they can use to rebuild their life. Groups like Alcoholics Anonymous are made up of imperfect people who are mostly trying to improve their life.

The only requirement for membership is a desire to quit drinking , and this means that almost anyone can join.

Every once in a while, those who attend step meetings may hear someone open a share by giving their sobriety date. There are men and women the world.

The editorial staff of Rehabs. Our editors and medical reviewers have over a decade of cumulative experience in medical content editing and have reviewed thousands of pages for accuracy and relevance. Never having heard of it before, my interest was piqued: What is this lesser-known step and what exactly does it mean? Simply put, the 13th Step is a colloquial term for when a Step old-timer hits on a group newcomer with less than a year of sobriety.

And, unfortunately, AA meetings give these perpetrators the perfect opportunity to work their disgusting magic. Thirteen-steppers know this and prey on these easy targets for their own personal gain. Sadly, many newbies find themselves romantically involved with a 13th stepper during their first few months of recovery.

Predatory Behavior Within the Fellowship

It’s time for a follow-up on my AA is a Cult? Essay of about a year ago. Two reasons for this. First, Newsweek recently published a three page article profiling an AA group in the Washington DC area which has been accused of cult-like and abusive behavior. And of course, as AA is by design an open organization at the ground level, there are not really mechanisms in place to keep predatory sorts of folks from joining and then manipulating the organization.

When you are new to step, they advise against having a relationship the first year. And dating within the rooms is an even bigger no-go.

Voices of Women in AA is a collection of 61 stories from Grapevine. Sections are devoted to spirituality, sponsorship, life changes, relationships, family, careers and friendships. The stories demonstrate the various ways women alcoholics—often with great courage—find sobriety in AA and embrace the program to live rich and rewarding lives. This collection of Grapevine stories shows the many ways members use the Twelve Steps, sponsorship, and the tools of the program to improve and repair relationships, old and new.

When we were drinking, many of us had, as the Step Four chapter in the AA book Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions puts it, “a total inability to form a true partnership with another human being. Real AAs, Real Recovery shows how AA members of all ages and all lifestyles from around the world; spiritual, religious and atheists; newcomers and old-timers have recovered and found a new way of life by working the Twelve Steps. All recovering alcoholics have had to deal with adversity throughout sobriety Despite the fear, pain or self-pity we are in when these tragedies strike, drinking is not an option.

The 13th Step in Recovery

Privacy Terms. The e-AA Group “Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Quick links. Can newcomers 13 step an old timer For recovery discussion. All the women I date are non-AA normies.

i. First, they discovered the role of “the spiritual.” Bill Wilson located Dr. Bob Smith through a “spiritual” connection. Wilson was introduced to Smith by Henrietta.

Women’s Recovery. Never forget this, the newcomer is always the most important person in the meeting. The original purpose of meetings of AA, and it says it directly in the book, is for newcomers to find and hear the message. We stay sober by helping the newcomer and, more often than not, the newcomer helps the old-timers more than they know. We are a community built on helping each other.

If you step foot into any Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, chances are that you will hear suggestions for the newcomer. Although a newcomer at first may look at the suggestions as redundant or be skeptical, but when you start to take some of the suggestions you will begin to see a significant change.

Sober Dating 101: Read This Before You Start a Relationship in Early Recovery

In early the developer of RecoveryAudio a fellow alcoholic was granted access to some 14, AA recordings from a few hundred different AA Speakers. The speakers were powerful, and some were well-known — those speakers and their recordings had to be made available to search engines so they could be indexed, found by us alcoholics, and listened to. That then inspired the developer over a 7 month process to build an AA Speaker site that not only hosted these speakers, but did so in a way that ascribed Titles, Tags, and Comments to speaker tapes based on Step, Category, or Recovery Theme.

The hope is we reward the visitor with a tape that provides healing or inspiration to continue to stay sober and pursue their own spiritual path with their Higher Power.

We are a community built on helping each other. If you step foot into any Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, chances are that you will hear.

Alcoholics anonymous began in in Akron, Ohio, as the outcome of a meeting between a New York stock broker, Bill W. Both of them had a severe case of alcoholism and were destined to become co-founders of the AA fellowship. They successfully carried the message to the man who would become AA person 3 picture in the hallway , cementing the system of one alcoholic talking to another to bring about recovery.

The Big Book was written in and is still used today. Still one alcoholic talking to another alcoholic. Program for those who want it, not necessarily those who need it.

‘I was fresh meat’: how AA meetings push some women into harmful dating

Aa mean that i am an international journal of growing up in your recovery. Long story of meetings or other general aa looking for dinner around my area! Hi guys from their remember that starts to best dating.

During the past two decades, I’ve dated both men in recovery and men who weren’t alcoholics (called “normies” by us in the program). I’m.

A t 23 years old, Asia Blackwood was the proud stay-at-home mother of three young children in a quaint Connecticut neighborhood. Day in and day out, she prepared snacks and watched with pride as her toddlers learned to share with each other while her husband worked. Life was picture perfect. She was often exhausted, and felt sad for no reason. This listlessness and unhappiness made her feel guilty, since she had nothing to complain about. It lessened my depression and gave me more energy.

The e-AA Group

What can you expect when you attend a step or Alcoholics Anonymous meeting? If you’ve never attended one, you likely have fears and reservations. Often, your only exposure is through what you’ve seen depicted in movies or television shows. What is the reality?

In the beginning, the boys in AA kept me coming back. But ultimately, going cold turkey meant giving up more than booze and drugs.

A sponsor is trying to have an affair with his sponsee. What do you think of this? Reply First and foremost, a sponsor should not begin a romantic or sexual relationship with the individual they are sponsoring. This is because the newcomer looks to the sponsor for guidance, support, and to learn. Despite someone being sober for a longer amount of time, that initial sponsor relationship is reflected through their journey.

One member is newer, has less power, may be in a vulnerable state of mind, and the other is there to assist, guide, teach, and provide support. Individuals entering sobriety should always choose their sponsor very carefully.

Bob D. – AA Speaker – “A Shining Example of Recovery from Alcoholism”